Rukiyuki Puzzle

I came from being Killua to Rukawa to Chaos to Goddess to Cherry blossom to Kiyuki Meili Chizuko to Diamond Stone to Aurora Caelestis to Mistress Gaga to Rukiyuki.

I am multiple in personality, having many faces, numerous identity.

Let me then give you the main fractions of my being:

From Anonymity, I became Gravity, From Gravity, I returned to Anonymity, And from Anonymity, I was pulled back to Gravity.

Anonymity. For once, I was unknown, I never had a name, a real identity, or

was I ever an entity once?

I am someone you will never know, exact and specific.

Gravity. There was this great force which pulled me into its swirl of energy.

It was Gravity.

Lost in anonymity, I found Gravity, pulling me back to the ground of existence, pulling me back to the abyss of my soul, my real soul.

There I found,

a pond of emotions,

of different faces,

of different entities.

Ah, is this me?

is this my soul?

Why, I am not just one, I am many. It was like walking into a wardrobe of various colors and designs, it was extraordinary.

I learned now that I can easily grab one mask and wear it on occasion, I now learned it was not my curse, it was actually what made me special, what made me exquisitely rare. so, now, why would I bother, fret over if people don't like me? if they couldn't understand me? if they choose to mock me?

I now thought,

maybe it was really my intention to confuse people,

to deviate them from my truth.

Maybe...

I always enjoyed playing their minds,

...tricks and stones...

I was a good puzzle...

...that I almost fooled even myself of the reality...

I Can't Keep Smiling Forever

Just like what they always say, "If you have problems, better keep them to yourself. People don't care about your problems, anyway."

We are not alike, in any way, we differ a lot. But I guess, they're really right in accusing me as indifferent. In fact I am indifferent, that's why I'm so distant from everybody, including those I learned to love, but who doesn't even see me worthwhile.

I have always tried to please, because what I wanted was to simply have someone that I can call my bestfriend. If to have a bestfriend an impossible dream, I can settle for a mere friend.

Tell me, is it my fault that I am too indifferent? Should you blame me for not being too showy of my feelings?

When I say that I treasure you so much, I sincerely do. If I give you a present, a hug or a smile, it is genuine. They say I'm plastic, a liar, a hypocrite. Heaven knows how it stung. I was never plastic, liar, and a hypocrite. They often misunderstood me, and my efforts to please and make my friends feel good goes in vain. It hurts to see them all together, it hurts to hear them utter words that I never heard as a friend, and it hurts to know that you are nothing compared to the other bestfriends.

Why am I always in the least? Someone least intelligent, least kind, least adorable, least loving, least careful, least funny, least beautiful, least talented, least friendly, least noticed, least rememered, least mentioned, and the least special?

I always bear in mind to make everybody feel happy and special. Their good is one of my biggest concerns. I don't care if they laugh at me, insult me, as long as I get to hear just one single statement from them..."You are so special to me." But what do I receive in return? Nothing. If there is something, it's "You are stupid."

I just want to be someone special. I just want somebody to know I'm here, to acknowledge that I'm loving not indifferent, and to be my bestfriend. It's just so simple, isn't it?

Now, I don't think I can keep smiling forever.

Guilty or Innocent?

From a friends Note in Facebook....

RULES:

1. You can only say Innocent or Guilty for each question.

2. You are not allowed to explain anything unless someone messages you and asks!

3. You must behonest!

Asked someone to marry you?

Innocent.

Kissed one of your Facebook friends?

Guilty.

Danced on a table in a bar?

Innocent.

Ever told a lie?

Guilty.

Had feelings for someone who you can't have?

Guilty.

Ever had feelings for your friend's bf/gf?

Guilty.

Ever kissed someone of the same sex?

Guilty.

Kissed a picture?

Guilty.

Slept in until 5 PM?

Guilty.

Fallen asleep at work/school?

Guilty.

Held a snake?

Guilty.

Been suspended from school?

Innocent.

Worked at a fast food restaurant?

Guilty.

Stolen from a store?

Guilty.

Been fired from a job?

Innocent.

Done something you regret?

Guilty.

Laughed until something you were drinking came out your nose?

Guilty.

Sat on a roof top?

Guilty.

Kissed someone you shouldn't have?

Guilty.

Sang in the shower?

Guilty.

Been on the best website for cool facebook stuff - facebookcraze.com?

Innocent.

Been pushed into a pool with all your clothes on?

Guilty.

Shaved your head?

Innocent.

Slept naked?

Guilty.

Had a gym membership?

Guilty.

Made a boyfriend/girlfriend cry?

Innocent.

Been in a band?

Guilty.

Donated Blood?

Innocent.

Still love someone you shouldn't?

Guilty.

Have a tattoo?

Innocent.

Liked someone, but will never tell who?

Guilty.

Been too honest?

Guilty.

Ruined a surprise?

Guilty.

Erased someone in your friends list?

Guilty.

Dressed in a woman's clothes (if your a guy) or man's clothes (if your agirl)?

Guilty.

Had communication with your ex?

Guilty.

Got so angry that you cried?

Guilty.

Stolen somebodies partner?

Innocent.

Made yourself throw up?

Guilty.

Wanted to be someone else?

Guilty.

Every night, I continue a dream.The morning after, I continue reality. When once, my dream broke me, I stopped living my dream every night. The morning after, I woke up broken. Then, I stopped living reality in daylight. Consequently, I'm now continuing a dream in slippers, and recounting reality in bed..

The way I imagined it all everynight, the same it happens to me eveyday...Now I have proven, the power of my mind..